Dear Miss Hooker Heels,I know we're not at the gym. We're at a sporting event. It's a men's volleyball game and team USA is playing against China. I love volleyball. Especially indoor volleyball. Especially men's indoor volleyball. I'm an island girl and volleyball is an island sport. We take our volleyball seriously. Volleyball games are where we sport shorts, zoris, and the like. It's where we yell until our voices crack and jump up and scream and such.
So please, Miss Hooker Heels, can you explain to me what's up with the hooker heels? Did you not get the notice that there are no trix to be played tonight? It's volleyball night, for fuck's sake! Aren't you afraid that you're going to fall off the bleachers in those hooker heels? I swear I was holding my breath as you were making your way to your seats because I was afraid the point of your heel was going to get stuck and well, you'd fall and keep me from enjoying the game. Also, should you decide to wear a barely-there hooker skirt to match your hooker heels, could you at least (1) wear underwear (2) sit with your legs crossed (3) not sit behind me? Call me crazy, but I much prefer watching the game without having to worry about accidentally turing around and catching a glimpse of your hoo-ha.
It's not funny Miss Hooker Heels. Seriously. I'm not laughing.
So the next time you decide to sport your tricked out gear, feel free. But please leave that shit off my court and go back to your usual corner. Thanks!
Sincerely,
The Fierce Runner
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