Thursday, January 04, 2007

Don't judge your body. Listen to your body. Find your edge.

Yesterday was my first yoga class in three months. When I was in class, I was amazed that I let go of yoga for so long. Needless to say, it was good to be back. I missed Dolian. She has such a good presence and I always leave calm, satisfied, and accomplished. Yesterday's class reminded me of why I take yoga in the first place. It's really to hear these words: Don't judge your body. Listen to your body. Find your edge.

I think all the CrossFit hoopla and the addition of superfit folks to the studio has left me feeling a little useless lately. (Yeah, posts with pictures of fellow female CrossFitters and their six pack abs don't exactly do wonders for my ego.) Today's workout was especially hard because I tried to cut less corners than I usually do. While my time was actually worse than the last time we did this WOD, I decided that for the new year, I'd take more time to do things better, to push the weight, and do less modification. I'm actually proud of my performance today.

Anyway... David, one of the owners has decided to do the CrossFit classes. I was really impressed by his drive today. It took him over an hour to finish, but he made it to the very end. Sometimes we get so wowed by the people who are the strongest, the fastest, and the fittest that we forget that coming in last is ten times harder than coming in first. Also, finishing just finishing deserves its own set of kudos. Believe me, I know this. It was a hard lesson learned especially after the Maui Marathon! Cheering David on reminded me of my yoga class. Don't judge your body. Listen to your body. Find your edge.

While we were waiting for David (and Sal) to finish, a few of the gals were talking about their weight and wanting to get more fit (mind you, these are people who are already fit). For some reason, I was getting a little frustrated. I felt like yelling out, "Please don't fuckin' complain about your six-pack abs and ultra-tight body around me because I just won't hear it!" But I refrained because I wanted to be nice. Anyway, I found myself in confident-athletically-fat-mode and told the gals, "I like my fatty. It keeps me warm in the winter and extra sexy in the summer." They laughed and David, who was struggling through the burpees said, "That's what I like about you. You have such a healthy body image." That's probably one of the nicest things anyone has said to me.

Anyway, a combination of these classes and conversations led me back to a mantra that I've completely forgotten about, but need to hold on to - especially in my quest to be healthier (for my diabetes sake). Don't judge your body. Dolain is right. I can't judge my body. Considering all the things I make it go through. I need to focus more on being thankful for her. She's alive, functional, and does what I need her to do and more. Listen to your body. I think we all forget to do this. I know I do. Lately I've been trying really hard to listen. Although it takes some work and practice, I'm finding that she'll let me know when I'm hungry, when I need rest, and when to push my limit. Find your edge. This is what allows me to stay strong and keep challenging my body. It isn't about killing myself to be a CrossFit goddess (because I like to think I already am one), it's about keeing things interesting and making sure I'm not bored.

So that's it. Who knew that the inspiration I needed was sitting right under my nose?

No comments: