sugar: the bitter truth

This is about 90 minutes long. However, it's definitely worth watching!

For Thursday:
Today's Small Victories
I made it to the gym and treated myself to cool Korean soup with tofu noodles! Ahem. Home made!

Warm-up
Run 400 meters

CrossFit One World WOD
Conditioning:
Complete the following for time:
Row 1000m
Run 800m
200 jump rope skips
Row 500m
Run 400m
100 jump rope skips

Joanne's Final Time - 21:27

Notes (to myself) about this workout: This was rough. I came in during noon to do the WOD. It was a nice change of pace, but I miss my 7:15 gals! This week has been really good. The WODs have been incorporating movements I really like such as kettlebell swings and OHS. But we've also been doing a lot of rowing and jump ropes. It's been a good programming week for me:)

For Friday:
One hour of yoga. Loved it! I'm getting better at the sequences. I just need to figure out how to do more of this!

zombie killers and other stuff...

First off, I want to give a big shout out to my dear friend Alex C. His most recent post caught the attention of Diane Sanfilippo (pictured on the left), the woman who runs a website called Balanced Bites: Real Food for Real People. Diane linked Alex's post on her facebook page for her legions of followers to admire. Yea Alex! Of course, you should read the post, as it pays homage to the strong and sexy.

Speaking of which, I highly recommend you all check out Balanced Bites. It's a very helpful site that promotes the paleo lifestyle. In particular, I recommend you invest in downloading the Sugar Detox Manual that the site offers. Her guides are very helpful in laying out an eating plan that incorporates good, sustainable, wholesome food. While everyone has health gurus they admire, I'd have to say that I'm a fan of Balanced Bites and Mark's Daily Apple. Since you've heard me rave about MDA, I'll focus on BB. One of my favorite things about BB is that she is local, so a lot of her posts address ways of eating that are bay area specific. In fact, you might like this post on fast cheap eats in San Francisco.

Today's Small Victories
I made it to the gym!

Warm-up
Run 800 meters

CrossFit One World WOD
Strength:
3 deadlifts on the minute every minute for 10 minutes 165#

Conditioning:
Complete the following for time:
Row 1000m
2 kettlebell swings (35#)/10 burpees
Row 800m
4 kettlebell swings/8 burpees
Row 600m
6 kettlebell swings/6 burpees
Row 400m
8 kettlebell swings/4 burpees
Row 200m
10 kettlebell swings/2 burpees

Joanne's Final Time - 21:27

Notes (to myself) about this workout: Technically, I was supposed to go heavier on the deadlift. Since I'm not as consistent about the lifting, I shaved off some weight. And I'm glad I did because the deadlift usually kills me. Also, I was following Angela's lead because she went about 30# lighter than me, claiming that it had to be lighter because we were doing 30 reps. Yea.

For conditioning, though I was probably one of the slower times of the day, I did do it rx'd. Also, I was really proud of my rowing pace because overall, I averaged 2:22/500 meters, well under my goal of 2:30/500 meters. Not bad for a shorty! fathlete confession: though this was a killer WOD, I kinda liked it!

in the news...

This story has been floating around cyberspace for a bit. I thought I'd share it. It's about Filipinos in popular sports. In case you didn't know, Tim Lincecum is Filipino through is mother's side. In fact, his Filipino American roots start in Stockton. It's in the article. Please don't write to me with your elaborate stories about how he couldn't possibly be Filipino. I'm already dealing with your hate mail by mentioning that Jay-Z, Foxy Brown, and Sharon Leal are also Filipino. Please direct your racist hater-ade somewhere else. Thanks!

By the way, congrats to the San Francisco Giant for making it to the world series. Woot!

Today's Small Victories
I showed up!

Warm-up
Two minute row
Stretching
Prep for WOD

CrossFit One World WOD
Strength: Establish a 5 rep max (155#)

Conditioning: "Nancy"
Complete five rounds for time of:
400m run
15 overhead squats

Joanne's Final Time - 29:27

Notes (to myself) about this workout: I've never established a 5 rep max on the back squat, so there it is. 155#. With more time, I think I could have done 160#.

I usually do well with Nancy. Granted, my time isn't great, but in the past, I've always been able to rx it and do the 15 reps straight. Tonight I just didn't have the magic. The first two cycles I did 63#; the next two cycles I did 53# and the last cycle I did 33#. My weakness is that (1) I've been sick all weekend long and I think it took a toll on me during the WOD. (2) It took me FOUR rounds to realize my grip needed to be wider. The OHS squat is one of my stronger lifts (technique wise). For the longest time, I couldn't figure out why I was so wobbly. Finally, Eric G. pointed out that I was much more stable when I took my hands out father. Gah!

CrossFit women

I stole this from Lyn M. at CFU. In truth, I'm always hesitant to share stuff like this. It goes with my whole, "I'm not interested in replacing one standard of beauty with another. I'd rather dismantle standards. Period." Still, I admire what's going on in this video. Strength is definitely sexy.

Today's Small Victories
1) I made it to the box!

Warm-up
Run 400 meters
Prep for the WOD

CrossFit One World WOD
Strength:
Deadlift. 5x3 @185#

Conditioning:
Start a running clock. Run 400m. At 2 minute mark, do tababta kettlebell swings. At the 6 minute mark, run 400m. At 8 minute mark do tabata pull-ups. Repeat for two total cycles (four runs and four tabatas). The workout is 23:50 minutes long.

Joanne's Final Time - Sorry. I didn't keep track of my tabata count.

Notes (to myself) about this workout: This WOD sucked! I worked on the bands, mostly hanging from them because I can't do a pull-up. Still...

some house cleaning...

There seems to be a major misunderstanding about this post. While I enjoy my right to free speech, I fully acknowledge that free speech is NOT consequence-free. Sometimes there are misunderstandings and feelings get hurt. In truth, I stand by my rant. They are true and honest feelings, all of which I have the right to express. However, it does concern me when my rant is misconstrued as an attack. With that, I greatly apologize to anyone who felt I was rejecting the LBN Challenge or any nutrition plan that the gym supports. In no way was I trying to attack anyone, reject the challenge, or put their reputations on blast. The plan is working out great for a lot of people. It's working for me, but I'm finding I need to incorporate some tweaking.

With that, there are some things that I want to clarify...

(1) When I claimed I was over it, I meant it. However, I do acknowledge the value of limiting my carbohydrate intake.  In fact, going low carb is actually good for me and my goal of letting go of some of the diabetes medication. My blood sugar levels are lower than they have been for a long time and it's due to the way I've altered my eating. No arguments there. However...

(2) ...as I mentioned in my post, some of the counting does not make sense. While I could eat meat freely (because 1-1.5g protein/lb of body weight goes VERY far), it was coming to a point where I couldn't eat vegetables freely. For example, at the end of the day, I would be at my carb limit (my previous post explains how fast 30g goes). For dinner, I'd want to make a caprese salad. But I couldn't because the vegetable content would put me over my carb count. It didn't make sense to me that I could not have this salad, but I could have t-bone steak. This would stress me out and on some nights, I just wouldn't eat because I couldn't negotiate what I wanted (a salad) and what I was allowed to have (a steak). While steak dinners are yummy, I was simply tired of the protein and it wasn't making me feel good. (Judge all you want, but I like the idea of taking a shit. I don't like smelling like a meat locker.) The stress of figuring out what to eat was raising my blood sugars. My waking blood sugar levels went from a low 100-115 to a high of 140-150. The stress of keeping a low carb count was defeating the purpose of maintaing a low blood sugar count....

(3) This is why I decided that this silly dilemma of negotiating veggies was not worth extra stress. When I said that I was giving up, I was simply declaring that I was giving up on counting the veggies. I think veggies should be eaten freely. Mind you, I'm not eating high carb veggies likes yams. I'm mostly eating eggplant, tomatoes, greens, avocado, etc. (For the record, since I decided to eat my veggies freely, my sugar levels are back to where they need to be.)

(4) When I mentioned that I was going to consult with my friend, I was NOT rejecting the One World/paleo/primal method and replacing it with Maria's method. I'm a scholar. It's my job to diversify my tool set. She offered a conversation and I accepted.

(5) Yes, I still think rejecting fruit is an act against nature. This doesn't mean that I advocate eating a pound of mangoes. Nor did I go on an all-you-can-eat fruit binge. (I can see where the assumption comes from. I'm fat. And fat people, apparently, do fat things like that.) I still understand the importance of carb counting. I was simply trying to say that for the sake of my sanity, I don't want to look at fruit as if it's the enemy. Fruit is good. I'll eat it when I feel it's appropriate for me to do so. Nuts are also good. Like fruit, I will eat them when I feel it's appropriate for me to do so. For the sake of the challenge and getting a true three month blood reading, I have decided to opt out of eating fruit and nuts. Yes. This makes the challenge even harder than it needs to be. (This also means I get to bitch and moan more than most!)

(6) Finally, everyone has an idea of what good eating is. There are a million books and experts that have something to say on the matter - all of which I'm willing to listen to and take note of. However, at the end of the day, I get final say over my body and what I put in to it. I'm the one with type II diabetes. I'm the one who has to live with the consequences of this chronic disease (including the fact that with my age and being diabetic, the likelihood of having children is small and highly risky; while I am in no position to have a child right now, it's a reality that breaks my heart). I'm also the one who is trying to manage this in a way that is sustainable and goes beyond the challenge. As I said before, I am looking to have a healthier relationship with food - one that allows me to resort to food to heal and fuel my body. I do not want to lose out on the pleasures of food. While I may get frustrated with the process, I reserve the right to feel whatever I want to feel with the process.

just the way you are

I'm in love with this song... I guess this is my way of letting you know what a cheesy-romantical-silly girl I am...



Today's Small Victories
I got my a$$ to the gym!

Warm-up
Conversing with Brad; taking a tour of the new digs-in-progress.

CrossFit One World WOD
"Time Trials 2.0"
You have one hour to complete the following in any order with as much rest as needed between efforts:

Run 1 mile - 12:35
2k Row - 9:38
800m run - 5:23
1k Row - 4:36

Notes (to myself) about this workout: My long run was way slower than I wanted it to be. Everything else was pretty much where I anticipated. In particular, I was really happy with the rowing. I kept on pace and really worked on form.

paleo find!

At the Lucky grocery store in Union Landing, they sell "Fiesta  Chicken
Salad." I think it runs about $6 a pound. A pound goes a long way and I
find that $3 worth of the stuff is plenty for a good meal. I've visited other
Lucky stores and it looks like this one is the only one that carries it.

Though it's fine to eat it as is, I did take my salad home and added
some extra special goodness: more lemon, olive oil, and a dash of salt.
It was sooo yummy. When I forget to pack lunch or am looking for a
healthy snack, this is my go-to meal.

Today's Small Victories
I wrote today's post!

Warm-up
Run 400 meters
20 squats
20 push-ups
20 Abmat sit-ups

CrossFit One World WOD
Run 1.1 miles
Tabata squats
Run 1.1 miles
Tabata push-ups
Walk 800 meters
Tabata Abmat sit-ups
Joanne's Final Time - N/A

Notes (to myself) about this workout: After being gone for a week, this was a good WOD to come back to. Yea.

over it!

Warning: This is a bitch rant. If you're not ready for it, don't read it.

For the record, I'm over this f--king challenge. I decided to dedicate myself to 30g of carbs or less per day. After doing this challenge and coming as close to 30g of carbs per day (on days I'm not 30 and under, I'm definitely 50g and under), I can honestly say that for me, 30g of carbs or less is complete bullshit. I've dropped five pounds... and that's it. Granted, I feel leaner and such. However, I've decided that the reason why the weight loss isn't where I want it to be is because I'm f--king stressed out about making my carb count. This is why...

30g of carbs does not go a long way.

Twice a day, in order for me to knock out the high protein count, I drink two green smoothies, which has 55g of protein, and 9g of carbs for each smoothie. This also uses up over half of my carb count for the day. That leaves me with 12g of carbs to play with for the rest of the day. If you want to know what this looks like, here it goes....

food / calorie count / carb count / fiber count / net carb (carbs minus fiber)
spaghetti squash (one cup) / 33 / 7 / 2 / 5
zucchini (half cup) / 15 / 7 / 3 / 4
mushrooms (1 cup) / 15 / 2 / 1 / 1
kale (1 cup) / 36 / 7 / 3 / 4
half & half (2tbs) / 34 / 2 / 0 / 2
Spaghetti Sauce (1/2 cup) / 60 / 10 / 1 / 9
avocado (1 medium) / 160 / 17 / 9 / 8
eggplant (1 cup cooked) / 33 / 9 / 2 / 7
roasted garlic (6 cloves) / 40 / 6 / 0 / 6
baked yam (medium) / 136 / 37 / 5 / 32
tomato (large) / 33 / 7 / 2 / 5


Basically, after my unsweetened iced coffee with half and half and two servings of veggies, I'm done with my carb count. Let's not forget that salad dressing, marinades, and cheese have some carbs. This is making my life so damn hellish. I've already cut fruit, lattes, all forms of potatoes, and said goodbye to all sweets, pasta, rice, and other processed carbs. I like to think I've done better than most and therefore, should be checking in some amazing results. However, I firmly believe that the reason why I haven't dropped the weight is not because of the eating. I've been quite good, actually. Thing is, I've been beyond stressed out to make the 30g or less. Stress just isn't kosher for weight loss. 

With that, I'm sorry, Alex. But I'm throwing your method away. I don't care about winning the challenge. Though you make a compelling argument for weight loss, it doesn't work for me (and it hasn't worked for other people - even you know this). I've given it my best. Right now, my body HATES me. I'm sick of stressing out over carb counting. I hate smelling like a meat locker filled with rotting bodies. Also, I can't stand that even though I'm drinking more than enough water, my digestive system isn't agreeing with me. While my blood sugar levels are lower than before, my stress levels are way too high. I'm also completely un-motivated to hit the gym because after the WOD, I'm hungry as all hell and just can't afford the extra five f--king carbs to eat! I'm so sick of this shit! None of this is worth five pounds. Therefore, I'm walking away.

When I signed up for the challenge, I wasn't looking to do something for seven weeks and then walk away. I'm looking for a life long change that will sustain me beyond the challenge, for life. Unlike many, I have no desire to compete in the games, develop a six-pack, or even "look better naked." My one goal is to just get off the diabetes medication. Period. If I look and weigh the same as I do now, but can take one less medication, I'm happy. Unfortunately, a lot of the motivation behind the challenge revolves around "looking better naked." I never thought of myself as ugly, so that serves no motivation for me whatsoever. I need to find an eating lifestyle that is sustainable beyond the challenge, one that lets me enjoy food as opposed to making me feel guilty about it. I also want to engage in an eating lifestyle that fulfills me. In fact, at each meal, these are the questions I want to ask myself:

1) Does this food give me the fuel I need to sustain myself?
2) Does this food heal my body?
3) Does this meal contribute to a positive experience in my life?

Surprisingly, these questions are what has allowed me to cut the processed junk. Though I get the reasons why fruit needs to be cut to a minimum, I feel cutting fruit out completely is inhumane. (Seriously. Life without berries is an act against nature. I'm not asking permission to eat it everyday. But sometimes I want to have a strawberry to top off a salty meal.)

So what is going to be my strategy for the remainder of the challenge (and my life, really)? Well, I ran into a dear friend who is fitness coach in San Francisco. She offered to meet with me and figure out a sustainable food plan. I told her about the challenge and she understood my frustration. We agree that my primary goal is to get off the meds. We also agree that I need a better relationship with food that is going to sustain me in the long term. In my email to Maria, I wrote:

I'm not looking for permission to eat pasta and cupcakes. But I don't want to look and fruit and feel like I'm looking at the enemy. Like I said, I want to work towards losing the diabetes meds. I want to find a way of eating that will allow me to do that. No bingeing. Just solid, healthy, sound eating.

I'm hoping to meet her this week so I can re-strategize. Until then, I'm focusing on eating clean - primarily veggies with enough protein to keep from from smelling like rotting road kill. Finally, I'm taking the week off from taking any measurements (no weighing). I'm tired of stressing over the challenge bullshit. Therefore, I won't do it anymore. It's not worth it to me.